1. Take a baby carrier, put a melon in it and walk around a clothing store. When someone comes up to you to comment on your baby put on a horrified expression and yell “My baby! Where is my baby!”
2. Take your your kid to the corner store. Beforehand give them the money to pay for the items you are buying and get them to call you by your first name. When you reach the cash register say “Mommy, can I please have a lollipop” to your kid. If the cashier asks you anything, just call it Freaky Wednesday!
3. In the morning stay in bed until everybody is up and wait silently. Once everyone enters your room for one thing or another just say “I’m on strike and won’t be doing ANYTHING today!”. Take in the sighs and dumbfounded expressions on your partners and kids faces. It’ll be as priceless as a MasterCard commercial.
4. Grab all of your used maternity clothes and one of your kids. Take them to the maternity store where you purchased them and try to return all of the obviously used things. When asked what is the reason for the return say “I thought I was pregnant but it was a false positive” and then turn to your kid and start a conversation.
5. Call your OB’s office. Ask the receptionist if they accept returns. When they ask what you are talking about say “This kid has had a good run but still isn’t potty trained and I was hoping to get a new one.” Wait for the cringing sound on the other end of the line.
PLEASE REMEMBER TO SAY “APRIL FOOLS” AFTER THESE PRANKS OR YOUR DAY MAY NOT GO AS WELL AS PLANNED.